THE LOWDOWN

Rumoured to be the oldest hotel in England, The Old Bell Hotel is an elegantly eccentric hotel at the heart of ancient, peaceful Malmesbury. The hotel may be ancient, but its recent revamp has breathed new life into the place – and it’s seriously cool. First used as a sleepover for dignitaries visiting the abbey, many period details remain: the impressive, hooded stone fireplace in the bar is believed to be one of the first flue chimneys in England.

There are three stylish lounges to kickback in, meaning that you can nab one of the jewel-coloured velvet sofas and not have to share. There’s a small, part-walled courtyard at the back, and a Tiki Bar with monkey lights swinging from the rafters. This is a hotel that’s fun with an emphasis on the fabulous.

THE VIBE

The Old Bell Hotel Malmesbury Wiltshire giraffe in hallway

Well, the giraffes kinda say it all. Expect it to be quirky, but definitely not naff. The Old Bell Hotel has been lovingly refurbished by its Texan owners Kim and Whit Hanks. The couple have an insane link to Malmesbury that dates back to the 1100s, when Walter Hanks operated a mill below the hotel on the River Avon. Kim’s interior design vision for the hotel is elegantly eccentric – think wild Duchess and you’ll know what I mean.

The décor is a love letter to the building’s history but is brought bang up to date with slightly bonkers touches, designed to make you smile. As soon as you walk in you’re warmly welcomed by the stately giraffes, Gerald and Janet in the hallway. The wallpapers are simply stunning, whispering tales of faraway lands, luxurious fabrics, and lamps that I would give a right arm to have in my home. The quirky touches make the space really sing, including ceilings adorned with giraffe and zebra prints.

The Old Bell Hotel Malmesbury Wiltshire lounge

There’s nothing stuffy about the hotel, it’s warm, welcoming, and very laidback. The staff were friendly without being suffocating and went out of their way to ensure we enjoyed our visit.

SCOFF & QUAFF

I came with my husband and before dinner, we descended to one of the three charming rooms serving afternoon tea and drinks, and was pleased to once again be cocooned by heavenly wallpapers and quirky trinkets. Many were antiques imported by the owner (a noted antiques dealer).

Then we settled down for dinner at the Abbey Row restaurant – a grand dining room that mixes old and new – the religious figures keeping a watchful eye on culinary sinners. Clean plates all round, people.

Kick starting the foodie affair, our wonderful waiter Jack helped choose us a lovely Spanish white wine to go with our chicken starter. Quite frankly it was a masterpiece, wrapped in a sushi-style mosaic of burnt leek and served with truffle, garlic puree, pickled mushroom, and edible leaves from the Abbey Garden. We also had the scallops, aka, perfection on a plate. It was accompanied by salty and crispy ham hock, lime, black treacle cauliflower, and a touch of granny smith to give a sharp contrast to the sweet scallops and salty ham. Yum.

For main I chose the Beechridge Duck Breast – the presentation alone was feast enough. The taste though – well, that was something else. The duck breast was cooked to perfection with crispy skin and tender, flavoursome meat. It was accompanied by a side of rhubarb which added a lovely tart contrast that cut through the richness of the duck. The parsnip was, no exaggeration, the best I have ever tasted. Its sweetness perfectly balanced against the savoury depth of the duck and the earthy, slight bitterness of the black cabbage. It was a large portion, but so delicious and my plate was clean. So, no sinning for me.

Meanwhile, my foodie date opted for what seemed a lighter, yet equally tantalizing, option: the Poached Cod with a spicy red pepper, black olive, courgette, and basil accompaniment. The cod was poached to perfection, its flaky tenderness a testament to the chef’s skill. But what truly made the dish stand out was the spicy red pepper sauce — a vibrant, flavour-packed sauce complemented by the salty pops of black olive and the fresh, herbal notes of basil. Sublime. The food is excellent – seasonal and locally sourced where possible and most of the vegetables are grown in the hotel’s kitchen garden.

Though we were absolutely stuffed, the allure of dessert and a cheese board proved too much to refuse. We opted for the Floating Island – a brittle caramel meringue concoction which was light, gooey and delicious, resting atop a sea of custardy sauce and a scoop of almond ice cream. We devoured it. We also opted to have the local fromage, including the creamy Cambridge Brie and the piquant Basset Blue complemented by lovely homemade crackers that added just the right crunch. To tie it all together, a spiced apple chutney was served on the side, it was sweet, spicy, and tangy. I was dying to take a jar of it home with me. So. Good.

After all that scoffing you wouldn’t think we could manage another morsel. Wrong. Breakfast rolled around the next morning where I had Turkish Eggs served with a garlic chili yogurt. It went down a treat with some crunchy sourdough bread. My other half, ever the enthusiast for a hearty start to the day, went for the Malmesbury Full English. He was very impressed, with special praise reserved for the hashbrowns which he proclaimed were among the best he’d ever tasted. Unable to resist the call of something sweet, I also sampled the yoghurt with berry compote and peanut butter homemade granola – drool!

For round two – after a walk and breather – was in the elegant Abbey Row restaurant. The grand dining room mixes old and new – the religious figures keeping a watchful eye on culinary sinners. Clean plates all round, people.

The Tasting Menu is a new addition to The Old Bell’s food offering – seven courses for £55. Exceptional value, but was the food any good? The menu consisted on tiger bread with marmite butter, roasted Abbey Garden artichokes, pickled, roasted & stuffed, with hazelnut and salsa verde; Scottish scallops and maple smoked pork belly, pigeon served with celeriac and black pudding; Dexter beef cheek and garlic mash (a generous portion) and cheese scone partnered with Tunworth cheese and truffle honey. The last hurrah was a innocent sounding rhubarb and custard.

The food is excellent – seasonal and locally sourced where possible and most of the vegetables are grown in the hotel’s kitchen garden. The highlight for me was the scallop and beef dishes. The flavour slapping you in the face – so, so good. Personally, I would have put the scone at the beginning instead of the bread and butter and the pud had a lot of punchy stem ginger which slightly overpowered the dish. But that’s the beauty of tasting menus, they challenge you to try something new.

PILLOW TALK

The Old Bell Hotel Malmesbury Wiltshire junior suite

There are 34 individually decorated bedrooms from cosy doubles to historic suites with an interior wow. The design here is an elegantly eccentric nod to the past with William Morris curtains or ikat prints, stunning wallpapers, and unexpected artwork. The five Junior Master rooms are really unique.

We were in the Athelstan Room which was a spacious sanctuary. As someone who is a bit of Goldilocks when it comes to beds, The Old Bell Hotel’s mattresses are like sleeping on a cloud. It was a supersize experience – an enormous bed dressed in crisp white bedlinen, a room with space for cartwheels and a bathroom large enough to wash an entire rugby team (not that we tried). The sofa was not just a piece of furniture; it was extremely comfortable and doubled up as a sofa bed. There were all the bits and bobs you’d want in a room like a Dyson hairdryer, soft robes, in-room coffee from Fire & Flow, Bramley bath and showers products, and the heavenly scents of Basil and Bergamot wafting from the Miss Aroma diffuser.

The Old Bell Hotel Malmesbury Wiltshire suite

My eyebrow was only raised when I clapped eyes on the full-size wicker Harley Davidson on the landing. No idea, I’m just glad I didn’t get too tipsy and try to ride it. The Classic rooms still offer space, while the Character rooms are smaller, with 13th-century painted beams, still ticking the boutique hotel styling that we love. The Coach House Cosy rooms are a bit more functional, but still fabulous and quite a lot cheaper.

OUT & ABOUT

Malmesbury Abbey (home to the tomb of King Athelstan, the first king of England) is right next door and well worth a visit for architectural drama. From there you can mooch around the quiet town or take a walk (or run) along the River Avon if you’re feeling more energetic than we did. A little further afield, Westernbirt Arboretum is a 10-minute drive, the historic town of Tetbury is worth a wander and King Charles’ beloved Highgrove is a mere 12 minutes away. Highlights also include the Badminton Horse Trials on the Duke of Beaufort’s South Gloucestershire Estate on 8-12 May and WOMAD Festival is right on the doorstep 25-28 July.

KID FRIENDLY

The hotel itself has a grown-up vibe, but kids are well catered for. Most rooms can accommodate an extra bed and some Cosy rooms are interconnecting, plus a kid’s menu is available too. We felt No 24 – a Master Cosy – offered the best space for families.

DOG-FRIENDLY

If you’re bringing your bow wow bestie, ask for a pet-friendly room (expect to pay an additional £25 a night). They’ll have their own luxury bed, bowls, and treats, plus lots of wonderful walkies on the doorstep. Pooches are also permitted in the Abbey Row Restaurant.

ACCESSIBILITY

Buildings that date back to the 13th century are not the most wheelchair friendly, but during the refurbishment The Old Bell has made some improvements. There is only one accessible room, so if you need one, snap it up.

THE MUDDY VERDICT

Good for: Dates, mates and family get togethers. Whether you’re eating, drinking, or staying the night, the elegantly eccentric décor makes it a memorable break away from your own four walls.

Not for: Anyone looking for a wild weekend on the town. Malmesbury is pretty quiet, but you’ll create your own fun next to the hotel’s roaring fire or the outdoor Tiki Bar.

The damage: Very, very good value. Starters from £10, mains from £21, sides around the £4 mark, and puds £10. Rooms from £185, including breakfast, plus Free Wi-Fi.

The Old Bell Hotel, Abbey Row, Malmesbury SN16 0BW

Review: The Old Bell Hotel, Malmesbury

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